Friday, November 18, 2005

It's Just a Game, Folks

One of the brighter spots for the Redskins this year has been Running Back Clinton Portis. Even in last week's loss to Tampa Bay, he broke off 144 yards of rushing and had one TD. But that's on the field. Off the field he has provided some very lighthearted moments with his Thursday press conferences. Perhaps costume parades might be a better description of these events. Well, take a look:

Dr. I Don't Know

The first character he unveiled was "Dr. I Don't Know." You can see that the costume is somewhat rudimentary, but it is harbinger of things to come...

Jerome from D.C.

Here is my favorite incarnation, "Jerome from D.C." Notice how the cape makes a nice statement while complimenting the mask.

Sheriff Gonna Getcha

"Sheriff Gonna Getcha" is my Sweetie's favorite character. The Led Zeppelin t-shirt contrasts nicely with the oddball eyeglasses.

Dollarbill

And yesterday, Clinton introduced "Dollarbill." Now this wig is the best of the bunch, but I'm not a big fan of the shades. Even though I do think the jacket is very cool.

Now I love football, but I'm so glad that Clinton Portis has a sense of humor about it. Too many people take these games way too seriously.

(You can probably guess what I think of the NFL fining Portis $20K for wearing different socks during a game two weeks ago.)

7 comments:

TheCompleteGeek said...

I like to fine my employees (OK, "employee") for wearing mismatched socks, too. Nothing keeps the team motivated like nitpicking accessories!

Hugh said...

How much are these players making? How hard is it to wear the regulation uniform? What if one of the Rockettes wore leg warmers at a performance? I'm not watching a pick-up game, and they call it a "uniform" for a reason.

Sorry, guys, I'm on the side of the league. Portis is right now in the midst of an eight-year, $50.5 million contract. So, let's say the contract is back-loaded, and he's making $5 mil this year. $20K is 0.4% of his salary. The same percentage of a $30K-a-year worker is $120. A speeding ticket on the Pennsylvania Turnpike. It's not going to hurt him, but it does remind him that he's labor, not management.

tommyspoon said...

Hugh, what did you think about the NFL coming down on Peyton Manning for wearing black high tops as a tribute to Johnny Unitas?

It's not the amount of the fine that bothers me, it's the fine itself. I realize that Clinton can afford it. I just don't understand the NFL's fetish with uniforms.

Hugh said...

What if someone at your company decided to wear blindingly bright Hawaiian shirts to go visit clients. Sure, some would think it endearing, but most of the serious clients would run like...like...like a guy running quickly. It would decrease the value of your brand. T.O. shooting his mouth off does the same thing. Peyton not wearing the regulation uniform is the same thing.

It's the Golden Rule, "he who has the gold makes the rules". Who else is going to pay Portis to run a 4.4 40? Charles Schwab? It's not a uniform fetish, it's protecting the brand, like Reid would look askance (and likely sue) a web services start-up that took the name FourSticks.com.

Swankette said...

tommyspoon - There's a reason they call it a UNIFORM.

And personally, Santana Moss is the greatest Redskin in my book, but that's mainly because he's on my fantasy football team. :)

tommyspoon said...

Hugh:

1. As a paying customer of the league, I could give a flying fig what Clinton Portis wears over his ankles. As long as he keeps rushing well and scoring TDs (which has been his biggest problem this season).

2. The "Hawaiian Shirt" argument might work if he wore a different jersey that day. But socks are different than a shirt. I've seen all kinds of business folk over the years wear various and sundry ties and hosiery that ran the gamut from awful to loathesome, but that didn't seem to detract from their ability to sell stuff. I think you're channeling one of your MBA texts again. ;-)

3. When the average person on the street hears "a $20K fine for wearing different socks", they're not thinking about salary percentages. They're thinking that someone in the NFL front office has way too much time on their hands.

4. And you still haven't answered my question about Peyton Manning...

Swankette, a Uniform is just another costume to me. I realize that certain members of the sports audience have fits if all the players don't wear exactly the same thing. I'm just not gonna be one of those people. (Too many years in the IT industry are to blame, I'm certain.)

Hugh said...

re: Peyton Manning. No, he shouldn't have worn the shoes. Wait, he can wear whatever he likes, but his employer and the league have every right to fine him up the ying-yang. More than half the fans don't know who Johnny Unitas was, or that the Colts used to be in Baltimore.